Apr 16 2014

From a time when “Shrek 2″ was a dream

(Click image for larger version.)

(Click image for larger version.)

This doodle comes from 2002, a time when “Shrek 2″ was a dream.

My pitch for the sequel saw Shrek* drop his club and pick up a paintbrush. The local-high-school marching band didn’t have enough money for uniforms, you see. Someone had to do something. So our green hero hit the canvasses swinging, depicting swampy landscapes in an Impressionistic style. A few months later, there was nearly enough money to buy one mostly complete uniform. The band still was screwed, but hey, free uniform. Roll credits.

Like usual, my pitch for the movie was rejected. But weep not! There’s always “Shrek 5.” …

*Editor’s note: What’s that you say? Shrek is an ogre, not a troll? Kudos to you, observant person. You earn a gold star. To claim it, just send one self-addressed envelope and $150 for postage to Doodleronomy.net, 348 Greendumpsterbehindthemall Lane, Townsville, WI.


Apr 9 2014

Little Known Fact: Roosevelt loved his fancy hair

(Click image for larger view.)

(Click image for larger view.)

Welcome to another installment of Little-Known Facts, Presidential Edition. Today, we consider Theodore Xavier Roosevelt, whose face is depicted in this 2009 elementary statistics doodle.

Roosevelt, or “Roosie,” as he was known, loved three things: dodo eggs, monster trucks, and his pompadour. He picked up the hairstyle while touring with Elvis in the 1930s. He enjoyed it so much that he had special hair elixirs shipped special across the Indian Ocean with him when he fought in the invasion of Panama in 1946.

So when a tragic curling-iron accident damaged an estimated 1/10th of his hair, Roosie took it hard. Historians consider the incident to be the defining moment his political career.

Though Roosevelt died in 1977, his legacy lives on. His sweeping curling-iron regulations are on the books to this day.


Apr 2 2014

Pop discrimination

(Click for larger version.)

(Click for larger version.)

In my younger days, I drank a lot of Pepsi. It was tasty, it was cheap, and it was tasty, too.

Unfortunately for me, the officials at my high school didn’t share my thirst for sugary soft drinks. Something about an “obesity epidemic” or something. So they banned the stuff during school hours.

As you can imagine, a wholesome pall fell over the student body during this period, which we dubbed “The Great Healthening.” Our teeth grew stronger. Our waistlines shrunk. Our wallets thickened.

Dreadful.

It was during that dark time that this doodle, featuring former Principal Gary Swanstrom, was courageously inked on a 3 1/2 x 5 note card. Someone had to do something.

Eventually, most of us graduated out of that health hole, finally earning the right to drink nearly any awful thing we wished. But the memory of that awful time is never far. The shining smile in the mirror assures that.