Doodleronomy

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Here we have a doodle that both makes me want to cry and laugh at the same time.

This college modern art class drawing depicts Edgar Tater, a 10th grade boy from Russet, Iowa. He is a nerd without a clue. When he’s not working part time at the grocery store or going to school, he is watching old VHS tapes in his mom’s double-wide.

Maybe you, too, feel bad for Edgar, with his comb-over, mullet, giant glasses, decades-old T-shirt, too-short shorts, lame shoes, awkward gait, and misguided sense of reality. But don’t. Our tragic hero’s biggest problem is an awesome one: He is the hottest guy in school.

In fact, he is the only guy in school.

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Thanks to the wonders of The Future™ (see patent number US6074736 A), we no longer have to worry about the horrors of the impenetrable tin can. That is not so though for the vaguely Russian-looking character in this 2002 doodle from a high school social studies class taught by Amy Flynn.

Tired, drunken, and hungry Kirill here desperately wants beans, but he can’t have them. A thin layer of treated steel stands in the way. The same technology that has protected the beans from decay for 17 years now protects them from digestion.

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This assortment of doodles, the product of a high school English class circa 2000-2002, features three characters:

• A crocodile.
• An afro-sporting version of my bald English teacher, Sam Jonas.
• An ice-skating, Depression-era comic-strip character. I like to think his name is Pete.

The white eyes of the skater remind me of Little Orphan Annie, though I don’t think I was channeling her when I drew that dude.  Adult Swim’s “The Drinky Crow Show” also comes to mind, but that show didn’t air until 2007. Perhaps the comic strip that inspired the show, “Maakies” had some influence. I am skeptical. I’ll keep you updated if I find a better theory; please do likewise. In the meantime, check out these absolutely disturbing comic strip characters I discovered during my search.

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