Jul 30 2014

The time clock

(Click for larger version.)

(Click for larger version.)

Today’s doodle depicts the time clock, a clock that can take you back in time. (It’s either that or a classic classroom timepiece. Who can tell?)

It’s common knowledge that the first time machines were technologically marvelous yet user-friendically horribleous. They required users to manually calculate the formulas that determined their chronological destinations. One mistake could mean the difference between experiencing the Renaissance and becoming a dinosaur’s dinner sauce.

The time clock turned the time-machine industry on it’s head.

Instead of performing maths, users dialed back hands, a much easier proposition for the average time traveler. Survivability rates skyrocketed to 4.5 percent.

Unfortunately, it also meant that a fast jump was difficult to say the least. (YOU try spinning a minute-hand around hundreds of times while an ancient army closes in.) But within a decade, digital clocks had become the norm.

Survivability jumped a full percentage point.

Jul 2 2014

Dr. Yancy Reese, reviewer of scrapes

(Click for larger version.)

(Click for larger version.)

Dr. Yancy Reese had been in tougher scrapes before.

Like the time in that temple when the floor fell away. Or when the time machine ran out of fuel.

This scrape was a six at most, Yancy decided. He would have emailed that decision to his editors, but he was too busy being frozen in a giant ice cube.

Ratemyscrape.com would have to wait.

Feb 5 2014

A musical about cats (not the one you’re thinking of, though)

(Click image for larger version.)

(Click image for larger version.)

A ship of cats navigating the high seas—pirate cats, that is!

That’s the concept behind “CAAAAAAATTSSSSS!”, a new musical from famed guy Paul Paulson. Fresh off a very nearly successful run with “Love in a Dinghy,” Paulson bids you to set sail for cuteness in a tale of adventure, riches, and allergies. These felines will steal your heart, not your ticket money.

“CAAAAAAATTSSSSS!”—coming soon to a grade-school gym near you! (Editor’s note: “Soon” is relative, considering the oftentimes ambiguous nature of time.)